5 Tips To Overcome Your Fear So You Can Share Your Work
I'm sharing a part of me that you often don't see anymore, because I've worked so hard to overcome my fear and self-doubt. I think it's important to share however because you might see yourself in my story and discover that you can really change. Especially when you have have a really good reason. Here goes...
I’m 6 years old. I’m really, really, shy. So shy that I only talk to children and never adults. My teacher sends me on errands almost every day so that I will talk to adults. She gives me a note or a book to bring to another teacher’s classroom. I go down that cavernous, dark hallway – facing my fear monster.
It’s dark all around me. I’m walking. I feel so small. Walking into the big unknown. Holding back the fear that keeps swirling up. Just keep going – I tell myself. The light will come. And then I’m at the door – light seeping out underneath the floorboards. And suddenly there is a bright light and a smiling face. “Bevelee” she says – in the way that Brits say my name. “Thank you!” she says.
I breathe a sigh of relief. I made it. I didn’t get it all wrong. I went to the right place. I didn’t get lost. Those were all my fears. I completed my errand.
I’m telling you this story because I want you to know that I was so, so shy as a child. I didn’t want to make mistakes. I didn’t want to be the center of attention. My teachers, in England, where I spent the first 7 years of my life, saw my shyness, and set up what seemed like terrifying challenges for me, so that I could overcome my shyness and use my voice – with adults.
I want you to know that when I write, now about owning your light, claiming your calling and your worth - I’m not and never have been, a frustrated attention-seeker who had to dampen her personality and dim her light to fit in. (And nothing is wrong with you if that’s you.)
I mean I probably had to, because I was always the only Black person in any of my social or professional circles, but I didn’t want the attention.
I wanted to hide.
I was more comfortable being invisible than being seen.
Until I discovered my soul’s calling.
The work I came here to do.
Because then I had to stop hiding, stop fitting in, stop being invisible.
You have to put your work out in the world, and deal with what you feared….criticism, making a mistake, offending people, not being universally liked and adored, getting lots of attention.
If you’re like me and you’ve been programmed to fit in, or you come by it naturally just based on your temperament and sensitivity, in order to put your work out in the world, you have to deal with all the things you’ve run away from.
And let me tell you something.
I’m not on social media because I like sharing my life.
I’m on social media because the people that need the work that I offer, need to know what I do and that I can help them.
I’m on social media to connect to the people that need me. (And to stalk high-school friends. I’m partially joking)
After 14 years of running an on-line business, I can tell you that putting your inside self on the outside – to be all of who you are and share it – not in some fake manicured way – but in a real, unpretentious way is the magic.
And if you’re born to be a healer or helper, this isn’t easy. Because you hold your magic inside.
Putting your full and true inside self on the outside – SO THAT YOU CAN DO YOUR SACRED WORK is going to continue to be your challenge. You’ll need on-going support to do that.
Sorry to be the bearer of this news.
Here’s what I’ve found to be necessary:
- Claim what makes you different. It’s being different rather than being the same that’s your magic. Do a focused, positive, self-assessment so that you can discover your hidden genius and claim it. What I’ve found is that claiming your unique set of gifts and your purpose, is key to overcoming your self-doubt, imposter syndrome, perfection paralysis & fear.
- Strengthen your WHY. Get really clear on the difference that you were meant to bring to the world. Often based on your own life story, experience & perspective – this is the thing that you want to change/improve/enhance in the world. This will give you a reason to face your fears and put your vulnerable inside self on the outside. Because, you aren’t doing it for you, you’re doing it for them (the people you are here to help, heal or guide). Born healers, helpers & guides only get motivated by providing something that is useful for others. When you strengthen your WHY, you’ll have a reason to overcome your fears.
- Get clear on HOW you do what you do. The way you do your thing is going to be unique. It’s different for all of us because we are all different. You may share a calling to heal or to help people to claim their genius, for example, but your specific method will be based in part on YOU – your unique perspective, your language, your background & your genius. When you are clear on how you do what you do, it’s much easier to share this with the people who need you.
- Keep doing your inner work. Keep questioning the beliefs that show up. Keep noticing the emotions that slide into your awareness. Keep unraveling and claiming your deepest truth. We live in a world where we are programmed and told what’s right and what’s wrong. And the programming is off. Be vigilant for the viruses that enter your programming and don’t allow them to stay in your energy field.
- Share and connect with other healers and guides that are on the soul’s calling journey. This is a unique path. Not everybody can relate. This is a pathway guided by your soul – where unabashed joy is the objective. It is NOT a solemn, serious, strategic mission. It’s supposed to be fun. This pathway is for those who realize that they are spiritual beings having a human experience. And we need deep, honest, soul connections to survive and thrive, that are sometimes hard to find.
I’d love to hear your thoughts on this! And, do you need help unlocking your hidden genius? If you haven't got my Guide To Unlocking Your Hidden Genius, you can get it HERE.
Get Unstuck with my Guide to Unlocking Your Hidden Genius
Unlocking your hidden genius is the key to getting unstuck. You'll overcome fear, imposter syndrome or perfection paralysis. When you get clarity around the unique set of gifts and purpose you bring to the world, you'll re-discover your passion, your motivation and your calling. Get unstuck now with this free guide!